Community Discussions
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How is it for ABC guys dating in Asia?
Main Post:
Grew up and lived here in the U.S. almost my entire life. Was wondering, any of you guys ever tried dating in Asia as an Asian American? Specifically, any parts of Japan, Korea, China, HK, Taiwan, Singapore, or southeast Asia including Vietnam/Thailand? Is it easier to date compared to your standard NYC/SF/LA/Seattle/Vancouver?
Do American Born Chinese (or Korean, etc.) guys get treater better or worse than white guys when trying to date girls in Asia? Curious to hear your guys' thoughts.
Top Comment: While it's better than US, Korea is very competitive dating wise. If you don't have much success at home, don't expect dramatic changes going there.
ABC Dating a Chinese FOB
Main Post:
Hi All!
I've frequented this subreddit in the past and it's been very helpful in understanding a lot of Asian American issues. It's comforting to know that I'm not the only one experiencing certain things, such as racism, insecurities, and internalized racism from Asian females.
I've been slowly reconnecting with my culture for the past decade. I've never disliked my Chinese heritage but when I was younger I distanced myself away from it to become more Americanized. I've done the following things to reconnect with my heritage: studied Mandarin Chinese (up to advanced) in college, lived and worked in the southern part of China for 3 years, and moved to a state where there are more Chinese people. My parents can't speak English, I had to communicate with them in Mandarin Chinese growing up, so my Mandarin pronunciation skills and grammar skills are fairly good. Though this experience has put me back some financially and career wise, I honestly don't regret it. I'm a more mentally and emotionally strong person because of this experience and I am very proud of my heritage.
I've been dating Chinese FOB females and don't seem to be hitting it off with them. They like that I can communicate with them in Mandarin. I feel I'm just not connecting with them. Maybe it's just a cultural thing. I'm currently dating a Chinese FOB and I really want it to work out. Have any of you ABC guys dated a Chinese FOB and had success? What can I do to make it work out in the long-run?
On another note, I've witnessed too many old white guys who marry Chinese women and there is little to no communications because the white guys can't speak Mandarin and the Chinese women speak little to no English. For some reason these relationships work out or at least I assume they do. When these couples argue, they have to use interpretation apps to argue. There were times I had to be in the middle to be the informal interpreter, it was like they were yelling at me. Oh my goodness, never again! I've had dinner parties with my Chinese FOB friends and the white guys would talk to me the whole time, while not interacting with their girlfriends/wives or the other Chinese FOBs. There were times where the Chinese FOBs were talking to me the whole time while ignoring their white boyfriends or white husbands. Seriously? This is fd up.
Thanks in advance!
Edit: I have another question. If a native Chinese has dated or divorced a non-Chinese, would it be more harder to date them or marry them?
Honestly, if a relationship is based primarily on money, through time it will fall apart! The female's beauty will eventually fade and the guy is left wondering why am I spending all this money with this ugly broad when I can get a younger girl. Or when the guy's money runs out, the girl will leave him.
Top Comment: id probably stop calling them FOBS.
Dating in Korea as an ABC
Main Post:
Thinking of taking some time off work and taking an Asia trip and I'm interested in spending some time in Seoul. Would be great to check out the city, enjoy the food and also I heard a lot of XF go to Korea looking for Korean guys. I am an ABC and was wondering if any other non-Korean Asian-Americans have dated in Korea and what it was like.
I'm curious about how interested both western XF girls and Korean girls were when they found out you that you weren't actually Korean/Korean-American. Any experiences/stories would be helpful!
Top Comment:
If I was you I would go to Beijing, Guangzhou, Shanghai instead. Why compete with Korean Men with XFs specifically going to Korea for KM?
Alphabet Dating
Main Post:
Been seeing the trend for alphabet dating on tiktok- essentially you do one activity (date) that starts with the letter of the alphabet. Trying to do different things with my long distance partner so would love your ideas on dates we can do online! This is what I have so far and will edit with any commented ideas! There can be more than one for each letter !
A- Art Night, Animal cams
B- Book club, Bingo
C- Cook together, Colouring
D- Disney Movie Night
E- Escape room (online)
F- Favourites night (fave movie, fave food, fave game, fave Pyjamas etc)
G- Geoguessr
H- Hulu, Happy Hour, Horror movie
I- Ice-cream
J- Jigsaw Puzzle
K-
L-
M- Museum Tour (virtual)
N-
O- Order food
P- Puzzles , Painting
Q-
R- Reading together
S- Scary Movie
T- Trivia night
U-
V- Video Games
W-
X-
Y- Yoga
Z- zoo tour/cameras
Top Comment: Didn't read the reddit group I am in and when I saw the title "Alphabet Dating" I thought, someone was going on a date every week with a different person, which names starts with a different letter lol. But hey I love the date Ideas! I should definitely try this out with my girl, I think she'd love it 🥰. Keep the ideas coming ✨️
Dating Chinese girls: Mainland versus HK versus ABC (American born Chinese)
Main Post: Dating Chinese girls: Mainland versus HK versus ABC (American born Chinese)
Top Comment:
Uh, English subs would be nice. Or are you on the wrong site?